Sandpaper and Stark-Raving Lunatics

Patience.  Something that I have never really had much of.  My personality has never really been one to cultivate patience.

As a child, I was very vocal and would immediately let my opinion be known.  I had no patience to hear the opinion of others.  I felt like the louder I spoke, the more people would have to agree with me. Generally, they did.  All was well.

As a teenager, I began to develop more patience for all things.  I waited tables at a local family restaurant, and I knew that if I didn't practice the art of patience, I could count on my tips being minimal at night's end.  I began to see the importance of patience.

As a young adult, I became extremely impatient.  I wanted to hurry and get married.  I wanted to hurry and start a family.  I wanted to hurry and get my B.A., M.A., and Ed.S.  In the midst of all this hurrying about, I did do all those things.  One thing that failed to stick?  Patience--remembering the importance of it, remembering to cultivate it, and remembering to practice it.

I found my lack of patience rearing its ugly head last night--again--on my poor husband.  Bless his heart, he takes it well most days, but some days not so much.  Fortunately, last night was one of those nights where he took it well.  I was ranting, fussing, and pretty much just being a stark-raving lunatic.  Over sandpaper.  Really?  I have lost my mind!  Sometimes I wonder if some alien has taken over my usually even-keeled brain.

The ugly feelings that followed were those of embarrassment, remorse, and just sheer stupidity.  My husband managed to say "I love you" back to me when I said it to him.  Now, I am certain he didn't want to say those words to me, BUT HE DID.  He looked beyond my ranting, fussing, and pretty much being a stark-raving lunatic to the wife he loves.  I am thankful for that.

Jesus loves us in this same manner.  We hurry about through life ranting, fussing, and acting like stark-raving lunatics.  Really.  We fuss when things don't go quite as planned.  We rant when someone hurts our feelings.  We act like stark-raving lunatics over trivial matters like sandpaper.  But Jesus see through all that.  He sees our heart that loves Him dearly.  He loves us, despite our faults.

Now, the fact that Jesus loves us is not our license to go out and act like I did.  Jesus calls us to a higher standard than that.  He just loves us through it and despite it.  He molds us and makes us what He'd have us to be--IF WE LET HIM.

1 Corinthians 13:11-13 says:

"When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.  For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.  And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity." 

I think I'll be staying away from sandpaper for a while.  Just to be safe.